Sometime in 1975 a work colleague of mine, and in those days one of my closest friends, arrived at the office one day and handed me the words to a song she said she had been listening to the previous evening. After reading the words I asked her who was the artist. She gave me a name I had never heard of and also the name of the album from which it came.

I checked it out, bought the album and then another one. I loved the songs and, after finding out more, the whole attitude to life of this artist. I also learned that the lady concerned had a great fear of flying, so did I at the time, and the chance of seeing her in London seemed remote.

However, in 1976 or 1977, I don't remember which, my friend told me that she had heard the artist was coming to London and a short while later I went to a concert she gave, the artist not my friend, at the Royal Albert Hall. It was an amazing experience. One woman, aged 50, three brilliant backing musicians, entertained everyone for almost 2 hours.

The lady in question was Dory Previn and you may recognise the surname. Indeed she was, for a while, the wife of the famous conductor Andre Previn. They had met when they were both employed as lyricists at MGM. Their marriage lasted 11 years until 1970.

Dory Previn had had a troubled childhood and this impacted on her later life. She had several breakdowns, one when she found out Andre had been having an affair with Mia Farrow, indeed had fathered a child with her. As she had not, at that time, conquered her fear of lfying, he had been travelling the world without her. At one stage she also had electroconvulsive therapy, a treatment I had witness in my youth (see here.)

It would be wrong to say her career took off after her divorce but in 1970 she released that first album I bought, releasing another the following year. However she never became a star, her following was a very select few. Many of her songs, were based on her own life, things which affected it and experiences within it while others took a broader view of society.

She remarried in 1979 and continued to work but did not perform after 1986. She died, aged 86, in 2012. I doubt many, if any who read this, have heard of her. Take the time to listen to my selection but also look out for some others.

This was the song that my friend wrote out for me. You may read anything you like into the reasons. We worked together for 3 years, remained friends for a further 8 and then lost contact only to speak again some 6 years ago. I think, though, both of us realised, even admitted, that too long had passed and both our lives had been influenced in a big way by those first 3 years and, forgetting any regrets would be easier in isolation..

One of the reasons I liked the words, without reading any other meaning into them, was that when I was younger I was incredibly shy. Someone once came to work in the office I worked in and I was introduced as the guy who had been there six months and not said a word to anyone. Not quite true, but probably close. It is really only in the last ten years that my shyness has disappeared. To those who are not so shy, it may sound strange for me to tell you that in those days I never asked a question unless I knew the answer. It would too embarrassing if I didn’t get the answer I was expecting.

This song reminded me of that time. Essentially, the singer is asking someone to stay the night but it is far more subtle than that and she keeps thinking of other things, almost trying to avoid receiving an answer.

Two days after receiving those first words, my friend arrived with the words to this song. I remember that over lunch the next few days, most likely on a paddle steamer moored near London Bridge, we discussed the meaning.

Once you've listened for a first time you might feel, indeed Dory Previn may have meant, that she is saying she preferred physical pain and lack of concern to gentleness and an examination into their relationships.

We had a different view and that was that a relationship that has passion coupled with respect goes so much deeper than one built on lust and need that it will always hurt much more when it finishes. I could add that a relationship that is not completely two-way at the same level will, in my opinion and experience, never be totally fulfilling.

Not all anti-war songs need to blatantly tell you war is futile. Dory Previn uses irony and even mocks what we do. I know this will not be approved of by everyone but we are all entitled to our views.

When Andre Previn had an affair with Mia Farrow she was 24. Listen to the song and I really don't think I need to say anything else, except that in 1979, after 9 years, Farrow left Previn for Woody Allen. “She will leave him one thoughtless day”.

This was to be the last choice of songs by Dory Previn but I suddenly found an actual clip of a life performance. On the now normal 2-for-1 basis, I had to include it.

Both my parents had died by the time I was 46. Not too bad compared to some I have heard about but, even then, I still hadn’t asked them everything I wanted to know about their lives. In the last few months of his life, my father and I talked a lot about things and I found out so much about his earlier life, his thoughts, feelings and his personality. But there have been so many times in the last 36 or so years (written 2017) when I would have loved to ask him, “what was that like”?

This started soon after his death way back in 1981 and is one reason why I have been writing this stuff so my own kids know a little bit more about their father’s life, his thoughts, his feelings. I was a very lucky child; I had an incredibly happy childhood although some may ask how if they knew certain things that happened. But I did and, possibly as a result of that, I can honestly say that not one day goes by without me thinking of, or talking about, one of my parents.

I love to find out more about people, what makes them who they are, why they do certain things, what inspires them, what plans they have etc. It is not, as some may think, noseyness. It is interest and it is also because it could, at some stage, help me. I am not too big to think I cannot learn from others, especially those who are younger and may have a different way of looking at life. I love to look “behind your mirror” and see “who’s beneath your mask”.

This song says all of that. I was also, for a large part of my life and for reasons you may have already read about in the “Tashy Did” part of the site, “scared to be alone”. It contributed to some of the wrong decisions I made. How great to compare Marilyn Monroe and Jesus and actually point out that all of us, whoever we are, or think we are, can have the same doubts and feelings. I have never had that many friends simply because I do need to get to know them and not pretend before. I can really call them a friend. I have seen eyes turn to stone.

This, as it explains, is from a BBC TV show Dory Previn when she came to London. I'm guessing the group behind her were the same I saw at the Royal Albert Hall.

The “live” song, though not a definite favourite, is still of interest.