1983

I didn't mention much about home and family life last time and that may be because it was there, it happened but, following our reconciliation, it just existed. Both of us had other interests and although I would describe the time as happy, there was nothing special. I now think that my wife, who had started to train as a teacher before we had met, resented the fact that I, untrained, was now doing that work. She began to get some qualification for playgroup leaders work.

The children were growing and were now both at school. My daughter did dancing and gym, my son gym and I was still helping at that gym club two nights a week, the youth centre two nights a week and, by now, my three days at the training centre. During the summer of this year, for the local carnival, I organised and ran a superstars competition for kids which was a great success and continued for a few years. Life was pretty full. I had retired as a house-husband, without a pension I should add.

At work, I was spending nearly as much time writing resources as I was tutoring. I enjoyed the creativity of writing but missed the interaction with the young people. During the early part of the year I wrote four more all-day resources similar to the “radio show” idea. I remember one in particular because it would have an incredible influence of my subsequent life.

I needed a different resource to find out about new trainee's skills so I had the idea to get them to plan a trip around Europe. They had money to spend on clothes (maths skills), they had to write why the wanted to go (literacy skills), they had to plan the route within a given time limit (problem solving skills) and they had to work in groups to do this (interpersonal skills). At the end they had to do a presentation of their performance, which 1 had decided, as an incentive to them, we would video. It all worked brilliantly. I found out what I needed to know and they had fun but still learnt things about themselves and their skills as we did a de-brief the following week when we all watched and commented on the video too.

A new intake of students were due in late July and I was asked if I would put together an induction package including a 20 minute video to show all aspects of the training. I was given June to put this together, I was provided with a camera, they were pretty big in those days and told to go off and film all the various different skills that were being taught. I filmed hairdressing and beauty, cooking, woodworking, painting and talked to instructors and existing trainees.

Then I had to edit the whole thing. Video editing, as far I was concerned at this time, involved having two video recorders and extracting clips from one onto the other. A voice-over was then added where necessary. Apart from the great fun I had with my own double8 cine camera my father had bought me back in 1966, I had never done this before but I loved it. I loved the planning of shots, the scripting, the interviewing and the filming. I will admit that I underestimated the time editing would take and eventually worked non-stop from Saturday morning through till 5am on the Monday before the film was needed but I made it. I suppose my perfectionism didn't help as I wanted every clip, every piece to be perfect. Of course I was totally unqualified paper-wise to do this.

I had done much of this work unpaid as I was still only contracted for three days a week but was probably working five pretty regularly. In August two things happened which solved that problem. I asked the council run scheme for full time work and was then head-hunted by a private training firm who had been told of my efforts. I met one of their directors one evening and was offered a full-time position as, initially, a tutor in September. The main organisation was based in Cambridge but this offshoot was in Essex and run by a woman with whom I would eventually have some problems. I will tell you more about this later but it all stems from the fact that I have a genuine problem working for people who have found themselves too high up in the hierarchy for their skills, possibly because of their paper-wise qualifications, and either ride along on the skills of their staff or blindly press on unaware of the disaster others are trying to clear up or, worse still, do both.

However, before this, we took a holiday for 3 weeks in Norfolk. As I was going to be working full-time and my wife was also almost in that position with her playgroup and course, we decided to take on a live-in nanny. Her role would be to prepare the children for school, take and collect them, help with household chores, and look after the children after school and in the holidays. We chose a young lady who had been on the child care part of the scheme I was involved in and, as a probationary trial, we took her with us on this 3-week camping trip. No better way to see how things would work out and so it proved. She was good and would actually stay with us for one whole year.

The holiday was also much needed but, as always, I couldn't keep my creative mind still and so, in the evenings when the kids were settled in bed, I began to plan a new resource similar to the “Trip round Europe” one but through the UK. However, after a day or so, it stopped being a resource and became a dream. I wanted to see more of my country, I wanted to travel and I wanted to write about those experiences. So, here in Norfolk, in July 1983, started the life that I have lived ever since. Along the way I have stumbled, fallen, been run-over but the dream has always been there and whenever a normal human being might have thought I| had achieved it, I have always found a new dream, a new idea or a new way for an old idea. I have spent much of my time swimming against the tide and for a non-swimmer that isn't easy.

Talking of non-swimmers brings me to a little anecdote about that holiday. We were on the beach at Waxham, where there are quite strong currents. My wife was reading a book, the kids were playing with the nanny and I went off for a walk along the tide line. Suddenly a little boy ran out of the sea and said to me and a guy walking the other way that his friends, three of them, were in trouble and couldn't get back in to shore. Now there are many people who know me who would tell you that I never think before I act. That is completely wrong; If a decision is not needed immediately I will actually spend hours thinking it through, mentally listing plus and minus points (see Holly) and looking at all possibilities. But there are times when you need to react before thinking and this was one of them. The other guy and I both went straight into the water and headed out to these three kids. He began to swim; I can't so I walked. The water was up to my neck when I reached the kids. The guy was already towing two of them back to shore. I caught the hand of the other one and, as I did, I nearly lost my footing and felt the incredible pull of the water. With much effort I kept my feet and hauled the young boy in. The kids' parents ran over and thanked us and I returned to my family to relay the story. It was really only then that I realised how near to disaster I had come. Probably, if I hadn't gone in, the other guy would have hauled out all three but he saw me and guessed I could take one. I won't say I had nightmares for several days but the consequences of my actions stayed with me for a while. The question I couldn't answer is what would have happened if I hadn't been able to stay on my feet.